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Monday, August 19, 2019


                          Starring: Ian Ziering, Erich Chikashi Linzbichler, Shelton Jolivette

                                                   Directed by: Anthony C. Ferrante


              Well, well well - it sure has been a long time away, hasn't it?  I know that I've missed all of the feeling mutual? Let's just say that my time away from the gang here has been a bit bittersweet to say the least, and at the risk of sounding too terribly sappy, I can honestly surmise that my craft has been honed to a sharp point and I'm ready to wield it like a very dangerous implement.

  In any event, the opportunity to come back and pay tribute to the site that gave me my start back in 2013 was too rich to pass up, and I hope that I can entertain you all in such a fashion that will at times, allow you to bypass my melodic rants and raves about the movies I'm tossing down in type - so settle in, crack some of your favorite beverages (be they boozy or not) and simply enjoy, for we've got a LOT to cover here!

  I'm going to be providing reviews on a multitude of sub-genres for you all, but to reignite the flames of love here it just wouldn't seem right to ignore the latest undead chunk of cinematic pasturage, and it comes in the form of director Anthony C. Ferrante's "Zombie Tidal Wave" - look out, kiddies...I think the shoreline has a new pollution issue. Normally, every August we've been rightfully bashed about the head and shoulders area with another "Sharknado" entry, coinciding to an extent with television's "Shark Week," but this year we get to see the ever-so-recognizable mug of Steve Sanders himself (a nod to Beverly Hills 90210 fans) - Mr. Ian Ziering, who also co-wrote this, ahem...nugget of campy righteousness. In the role of Hunter Shaw, Ziering and his pals discover a literal undersea populace of rotting residents, all coming to the surface, thanks to a secret experiment gone awry by a less-than-honest corporation that tried to cover up their wrongdoings by sinking a boat with chemicals and praying the horrific after-effects would never come to the light of day - well we as horror fans know the results of trying to hide evil-doings, now don't we?

  At the risk of spilling too much blood and details about the film, I'll simply say this: what was thought to have been cast-away (see what I did there?) floats to the saline-brimmed sea faster than you can say "TELEVISION-GOLD." Now we've got a bit of an apocalypse on our mitts, and I don't even think the cast of "Baywatch" could put away these creatures...Hasselhoff or not! In a nice little twist to the whole dispatching of these deceased chum-buckets, electrocution appears to be the only way to correctly capsize the crumbled collection of flesh-chewers for good - any way you slice it, things are going to get very messy down by the ocean. What follows is nothing more than a 90-minute slaughter-fest that should appease even the pickiest of zombie-flick aficionados, with plenty of hokey action, but surprisingly no cameos to speak of with this presentation. What worked for Ferrante in the past with his tornadic-shark movies gets tossed overboard here, and to be honest the movie doesn't suffer a metric-league as a result. 

  Ziering plays this one differently than his "Nado-like" predecessor, if you will - and that's not to say that there isn't a degree of artificiality to his character, but it's not quite as heavily coated in absurdity as the previous personality he portrayed. Buoyed by an admirably-adept supporting cast, the movie uses a blend of CGI and limited practical effects to give the audience a commendable mixture that enhances the viewing experience without giving into the modern blueprinting of constructing visual eye-candy.

  Overall, I'd absolutely recommend this offering to both the casual as well as the hardcore zombie-lovers, and I honestly think we're going to be set up for quite some time with sequel-material after the credits have rolled here. Look at it this way: would you rather have a bunch of bloodthirsty sharks spinning in a weather-related incident putting the teeth to a litany of B and C list actors? Wait...on second thought - don't answer that - just watch this one and see if you feel the need to hit the coast anytime soon for a dip in the great big blue.

    RATING: 3 OUT OF 5

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